ADHD-Man

January 16, 2025

Somewhere in suburbia he’s goldfishing, tornado mode, chronic score creep, happy feet.



He does the front door Macarena.


Keys, phone, wallet, plan?


Why so chaotic?


He forgot the Kiddy Coke, the Speed, Uppers, Vitamin R, R-ball, Skippy, Smarties, Kibbles & Amp Bits, Diet Coke, R Pop, Coke Junior, Jif, his Study buddy?


Opening credits role.


Music starts: ‘Dinna dinna dinna dinna dinna dinna dinna dinna


A Deep Voice rumbles “He is vengeance. He is the night. He is ADHD-man.


Defending the ‘lazy’, the ‘stupid’ and the ‘sloppy’, avenging those who feel guilty, ashamed and confused about their special powers.


Unleashed on him by his own cruel fate, ADHD-man wages war against the slow thinkers, the narrow-minded and the evil multi-taskers.


ADHD-man thinks outside of the box. He can’t remember where he put the box.

Spontaneous, going with the flow, distractible and hyperfocused.


Get tasks done and lose track of time.


Can he reach the glamorous bikini-clad lady inexplicably tied to the railway line?

Can he divert the onrushing freight train?


Well he could have done, but he got distracted by the lizard sunning itself on the grassy embankment.


He overcomes the tallest problems with a single idea and doesn’t know where he left the keys to the Scat-Mobile.


He’s not a playboy. That would require socialisation.


He is no billionaire either, although many of his ideas will make others rich.

Either way, he doesn’t worry, just moves on.


Queue Title Music

Dinna dinna dinna ADHD-MAN.


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